Balance Isn’t Real, Striving For More and Healthy Rhythms of Growth

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“This is just for now, things will slow down.” -Me, Callie Holland

That’s a direct quote I say to my husband every two months or so when he tells me we have too much going on. It’s a pattern. Every time I do the work to take something away,  I add something in. My pastor actually just said it this way, “If you’re going to add, you have to subtract.”

I have this habit of just letting life happen to me and I’ve pretty much prided myself in my ability to fly by the seat of my pants. Just scrambling along, making things happen. Like a sand crab when a flashlight hits. But, good grief, it’s exhausting. My brain is trying to compute too fast and in my effort to keep up, I start slipping a little in a lot of places – then I’m frustrated. When you layer on frustration with exhaustion – well, let’s just say my fuse is pretty short and I’m a breath away from spewing words and thoughts that probably need to stay unspoken and unthought. (I’m looking at you lady who ran in front of me to get in line at target check out with your 207 items. In that scenario I just said it all with my eyes – you know?)

I’m not trying to be cliche or the old person in the room talking to “kids these days” – but seriously, the older you get the busier you are. I am drowning in busyness. With that same age comes a better ability to step back and broaden your view. To see the fullness of what needs to take a priority instead of the urgency of what forces its way in. I’ve heard it said so many times, “Just because it’s urgent doesn’t mean it’s important.” There’s a difference.

A couple weeks ago, I found myself asking one of my favorite people and long time mentors to spend some time with me so I could hear his thoughts on the mix bag of emotions I’m feeling around purpose, progress and patience. (You see what I did there with the p’s? Isn’t that satisfying?)

So, I had a conversation with Don Wilson, who I’ve lovingly called Nuthead since childhood for reasons I still to this day can’t fully explain. I asked him: What does mean to find balance? How do you know you’re settling into your purpose? How do you make sure, across all seasons of life, to hold tight to what you know you’re meant to do, but still hold it loosely enough to hear when you need to make some adjustments? How do you pursue success (personally and professionally), without sacrificing your greatest responsibilities? He, like only he can, spent a lot of time correcting my way of thinking. I was approaching it all wrong. And I made sure to bring my recording stuff along because if there’s one thing I do know – there aren’t many times I don’t need to record mine and Don’s conversations because they are that good.